2
Does This Ever Get Easy?
Posted by Lisa
on
5:59 PM
in
dating
Recently I went on a date with a guy and at the time I thought it went pretty well. I found him incredibly easy to talk to and we seem to have a lot in common. It also didn't hurt that he was quite attractive as well. It seemed that he was interested in me as well so overall I would classify it as a successful date.
So here's the problem (and you knew there had to be one)...I don't know what I am supposed to do now. Between all the failed relationships, screwed up dates, friendly advice and pop culture examples I've experienced I've pretty much realized that no matter what I do, it won't be the right thing.
The thing is, I'm 33 years old. I'm tired of having to play games with people. But as a woman if you're direct and to the point, guys think you're pushy, aggressive and clingy - generally not the most desirable qualities in a potential partner.
It's not that I think after one date you should jump into a committed relationship. It's just that I wish I didn't have to feel like a tool admitting to the guy that I really enjoyed spending time with him and would really like to do so again soon. Yet I did admit this, and now, not surprisingly, I feel like a tool.
See it's just that I can't seem to forget something I read once. If a guy is really into you, he'll want to talk to you, he'll want to see you, and he'll make the effort to do so. If not, well, he's just not that into you (guess where I read this!). And as silly and trite the whole book was, there does seem to be some logic behind it.
Now I have to be fair; since this date I've heard from the guy in question multiple times including a nice phone conversation last night. But I just can't shake the feeling that every time I initiate a conversation with him that I'm annoying him. This is totally on me - he's never done or said anything of the sort. I just can't shake the feeling that in expressing interest in him I'm doing something wrong.
It's been so long since I met someone who is exactly what I want in a partner, that I'm afraid I'm going to screw it up.
*Sigh* Life would just be easier if Sidney Crosby would just realize he loves me.
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So here's the problem (and you knew there had to be one)...I don't know what I am supposed to do now. Between all the failed relationships, screwed up dates, friendly advice and pop culture examples I've experienced I've pretty much realized that no matter what I do, it won't be the right thing.
The thing is, I'm 33 years old. I'm tired of having to play games with people. But as a woman if you're direct and to the point, guys think you're pushy, aggressive and clingy - generally not the most desirable qualities in a potential partner.
It's not that I think after one date you should jump into a committed relationship. It's just that I wish I didn't have to feel like a tool admitting to the guy that I really enjoyed spending time with him and would really like to do so again soon. Yet I did admit this, and now, not surprisingly, I feel like a tool.
See it's just that I can't seem to forget something I read once. If a guy is really into you, he'll want to talk to you, he'll want to see you, and he'll make the effort to do so. If not, well, he's just not that into you (guess where I read this!). And as silly and trite the whole book was, there does seem to be some logic behind it.
Now I have to be fair; since this date I've heard from the guy in question multiple times including a nice phone conversation last night. But I just can't shake the feeling that every time I initiate a conversation with him that I'm annoying him. This is totally on me - he's never done or said anything of the sort. I just can't shake the feeling that in expressing interest in him I'm doing something wrong.
It's been so long since I met someone who is exactly what I want in a partner, that I'm afraid I'm going to screw it up.
*Sigh* Life would just be easier if Sidney Crosby would just realize he loves me.
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